This Editorial was written by Mick Swasko, a news
reporter for the Daily Vidette, IllinoisStateUniversity's
It's safe to say I have a fairly
skewed sense of fashion.
Although most people would realize
this by just looking at me, it took me a bit longer to fully realize.
While my fashion sense may be
semi-tuned in some areas, there remain other areas of the trendy world I cannot
grasp. Some days I look like a tooled up prep, others like an
appearance-negligent vagrant, others still some emo-kid (without the
emo-problems). But while I may manage not to look like a complete idiot when I
dress myself, there are still things I do not understand.
One of these things is definitely
stylish men's wallets and women's purses. My wallet is made of duct tape, far
from an expensive style that people pay $200 to obtain an imitation of. I
cannot even begin to imagine what is so special about these colorful pieces of
I fully realized this arm-bag
illiteracy last month when my sister Laney bought a new wallet.
"It's a Mark and
Christopher," she said in a monotone and dryly sarcastic voice.
"I hate it when girls spend
God-awful amounts of money on brand name purses," I said, attempting to
sway her from succumbing to the vicious handbag market that has gripped today's
Before she could defend herself, I
cut her off. Certainly I expected this from other girls her age, but not her. I
pulled out my wallet.
"Look Lane, mine is made of duct tape. I
have had it the whole year and I spent all of $10 on it. It is sturdy and...”
"Mick, Mark and Christopher
isn't a brand name, I bought it at Shoe Carnival for five dollars," she
"Touché Laney, touché."
Besides restoring my confidence in
her, this incident also made me realize my complete lack of knowledge about
fashion accessories. What I do know is that men and women are both becoming
guilty of purchasing these glorified leather money-holders. A men's Burberry
wallet is just as bad as a women's Louis Vuitton purse.
However, while I remain completely
stunned by the laughably priced sacks of bovine skin that hang around the
shoulders and in the pockets of the trendiest, I too am guilty of indulging in
what I consider a rather expensive leather item. While it may not be the trendiest
or flashiest as of yet, with the right support, it could replace the current
The first time I saw them was also
the first time I felt as if, no pun intended, I was in a woman's shoes.
I was at the Arrow Gift Shop in Eagle River, Wisconsin.
I was drawn to them. They were a light tan, and smelled exactly like I would
have imagined: like Grade A Canadian Moose.
I'm secure enough with myself to
admit what happened next. I uttered the least masculine words I have ever
"Oh my God, I have to have
From that point on, my moccasins
and I have been inseparable. I now own two identical pairs, which I honestly
cannot tell apart because they are quite possibly the most durable genuine
moose skin moccasins ever produced by genuine Minnetonka Native Americans. They
are comfortable too. I kid you not, it is literally like walking on a cloud,
except it's not actually a cloud, it's a moose.
If you don't believe me, I will
convert you. If you see me around campus, I am not joking, stop me and ask for
a test drive. I will gladly take off my precious footwear and let you
experience what walking in genuine moose feels like.
Some of you may be a little
uncomfortable knowing that a moose was killed so I can wear shoes. But how many
cows were killed per year to make a purse that will be in style for all of 3
minutes? I bought my first pair of moccasins four years ago, and I assure you,
that moose did not die in vain.
Since they are durable and always
sensible, you can be certain you are saving a cow's life by ditching the purse
trend and enabling the Moccasin Trend to become mainstream.
So I ask, what are you waiting for?
Take that $400 dollars you have been saving for a Burberry Wallet or Prada
Purse and hop on the bandwagon of a really cool trend for a fraction of the
The cows will thank, and you can be
considered a trendsetter for much less than the cost of a trendy purse and its
accompanying insurance policy.